onward.

let's pretend this weekend didn't happen. although, hard to considering the MASSIVE BRUISES on my knees. fuck. ah well.

b: -.5 fage greek yogurt (100cal) <--i bought the full fat one accidentally? wtff. gross. ate way less than half, but to be sure.
    -5 blueberries (10cal? found different info)

total so far: 110cal.

in other news..back on prozac. really low dose though. hoping it won't make me gain again. ah well. off to class, shit-ton of orgo studying and calc to do. fuckk.

12:15
l: three small pieces of celery -6cal
   three slices of carrot -10cal
   3.5 kashi triscuit-type things -60cal
   1 string cheese -50cal
lunch: 126cal.
total: 236cal.

3:45
l2: 3.5 kashi triscuit -60cal
     luna bar -180cal (found it in my bag and i was starving..)
l2: 240cal

total: 476cal

going swimming.


okay, didn't swim as much as i should've, but it felt good. then elliptical for ten min - 125cal. not much but whatever. same amount as lunch. thennn dinner hit.

had some baby spinach leaves, bit of tuna, two baby carrots. then a bit of refried beans and cheese and salsa. no rice even. guessing all that was 250cal or so. then had the cheesecake. 400cal. orzo and cheesy cauliflower. 200cal. some of that gross coconut cream pie. 100cal. making..950cal. in one meal.

that is absolutely disgusting. puts me at a net intake of 1426. fuck me. tried to purge but only got coconut cream shit up. god i hate myself. tomorrow's one year since my suicide attempt. fabulous.