big isn't beautiful.

let's start with a pictchaa of me. [warning, you may want to avert your eyes..]

blechhh.

That was Saturday morning, moody as hell after being fired for a shitty reason, I refused to get out of bed. And so I lay there in all my fat glory. So lazy. And then took pictures, to just show myself how much work I have to do. I seem to keep forgetting, keep slipping. Hmm.

For example.. this morning? I got up, 8.10, got angry that my brother decided to spend 45min in there (what the fuck), and had four blueberries and a spoonful of lowfat yogurt as my breakfast. Drank some water, then hopped on my bike to head to class. Now, I just mapped it out online, and apparently it's 2.5mi from my house to the lecture hall. I'd say a 5mile bikeride in the morning is a fairly good wakeup. I was supposed to meet up with a friend after class to grab coffee and chat, but I got out early and she didn't answer her phone, so I headed home. Home, to a pantry and fridge and cupboards; all full of food. . . and temptation.

I started with a small bowl of special k. Starving and too lazy to measure, I threw a small handful of dried cranberries and an equal amount of blueberries on top and poured on the skim milk. It was deliciouss. Washed that down with a glass of iced coffee, and I was set. Oh, until I stood at the kitchen counter hacking off pieces of the lemon poppyseed . . loaf my mother had made. Then, an hour later, sat at the table with a bag of tortilla chips and tub of salsa. Fortunately the chips are 150cal for 15 of 'em. I know I didn't go over fifteen. The salsa..10cal per ounce. So call that one 170cal total. The lemon poppyseed..call that 200? The cereal I know isn't more than 100, plus milk call it 180. Plus fruit, make it 250. This puts me at.. 620cal. Disgusting. More than I wanted to consume for the day. Pretty sure I can get away with just salad for dinner though, and going for a killer workout with my friend after I get out of class...which is where I am now. According to fitday.com, my biking burned me about 240cal. I estimated low, so there we go.

620in - 240out = 380.

fair enough.

"skinny is sexy, big isn't beautiful.."

late-night-update. Burned another 270cal through cardio at the gym, some more through strength training of course. Consume 1/4 flatout wrap with .5cup tuna, tiny bit of mustard, and a leaf of lettuce before I went. Dinner was (all chopped up small) 1 big leaf romaine lettuce, 4 red cherry tomatoes, 4 yellow cherry tomatoes, bit of cucumber, and some bits of chicken, with a splash of lemon juice, balsamic vinegar, and pepper. Also had 5 baby carrots and a tbsp of hummus. Dessert was .5cup lowfat yogurt, splash of cinnamon, and two strawberries chopped up. Oh, and a few pieces of special K mixed in. Yum. Shall add up those cals in the morning. xo.